Ever Need a Break?

Seriously I needed one today. It has just been one of those days where you feel so much pressure. I just wanted to go into the basement to scream at the top of my lungs to release some and I honestly would've but I didn't want to scare my babies either so I just held it in. But seriously I need a break. I need a spa day or something, or a date with the hubby would be really nice right now. Just thinking out loud...

God at Work

It's weird to me at times how God answers prayer. I've been praying a ton over the last few years on some pretty heavy topics and finally awhile ago I decided to take a break. Not from prayer but from worry. We as a people worry in a ton of different ways. My worry translated into seeking others for advice and that wasn't very helpful it just lead to more worries etc. So I took a break and just let go.

Another thing we've been praying over is where our next move should be. We were pretty focused in on Atlanta with a few side glances at North Carolina. Our main requirements were that the location had to have at least 3+ acres, with diverse schools, and we didn't want to be right up against our neighbors. So we took a trip to NC and Atlanta this summer. I can't really say much about NC, our time there was spent visiting family and friends and we crammed a lot into 2 days so we really didn't do any sight seeing, so I have no opinions about it good or bad. We did spend a ton of time in Atlanta and of course we loved it. So when we got back to Ohio we began to do a lot of praying and asking God where does he want us to be and we didn't specify, just asked for His guidance on an area and then a funny thing began to happen...the more we prayed, the more we fell in love with Cleveland...

No I'm serious, I began to love our four seasons. I've been home for 3 years now and I've since fallen in love with our snowy winters, especially since I have a choice as to whether I have to get out in it or not :-) And due to the many things I'm involved with I have met a ton of people, life long friends and I just have a really good time right where I'm at. Sam and I both came to the same conclusion and settled on staying in a suburb here.

And then there's more, after that decision I started looking and praying over schools. I know the first couple of years will probably be home schooled, something I've become pretty passionate especially for my son, we'll see with our daughter, but after a few years we'll probably send them to school so we'll still have to find an area with a nice district. So our prayer has been for God to guide us on if He wants our children to go to a public school, private school or stay home schooled and if He wants us to Home school then provide us with the tools and skills necessary to do so. We have a few more years before this decision needs to be made but I like to start early with my prayers.

We were really looking around Solon, falling in love with it when I ran into someone who said "look at Orange" I thanked the person and kind of brushed it off. Then I ran into a retired school teacher at one of our playgroups and she named Orange as a place we should check out. So I thought this is getting weird. Then Sunday we were over another friends house and she said "Hey have you looked into Orange City Schools?" So I told my hubby that we should drive out to Orange. We both know exactly where it is but have never explored it. Before we went I pulled up the school online. It's not only diverse it's also the number one school district in Ohio. Number 1!!!! I did some more research and discovered that three cities go to this school, Moreland Hills and half of Hunting Valley...both areas boast about having homes with 5+ acres!!!!! Ok so now I was totally in love. So we hopped in the car and drove out to see it. Beautiful doesn't even begin to describe it. We especially loved Hunting Valley, it literally looks like something out of a magazine, so many acres, so beautiful and country...and in Cleveland!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So let me continue with this prayer thing. I said if God truly wants me too we're leaning toward homeschooling in the early years anyhow unless He tells us otherwise. So this past summer has been a blast. For some reason Sam and I literally became the best of friends with some of our neighbors. We've all always gotten along but for some reason this summer we became extremely close (which further fueled my love for Cleveland). So until God is ready for us to move we have a really great neighborhood here. No crime, tons of shopping and great highway access and the best neighbors ever. So we've found an area to move to when the time is right, but until then why not just be content here and save up a ton for the house we want in a few years and especially if I'm going to be homeschooling I don't have to worry about our horrible school district. I love that plan right now!

So my prayers haven't stopped there. Remember I said I used to seek out advice but have since quit. Most of it was on my children but I found very few people in similar situations as mine so the advice wasn't always helpful and at times it was just damaging, so I decided to just step back. I just relaxed and consulted God on a lot of issues and was surprised (literally) by what He did.

First I had a lady coming over from our state program and in the beginning she wasn't very helpful so much so that Sam thought maybe we should quit having her come out to the house. But something in me wanted to keep seeing her. She'd come out once a month and what I liked about her is that she brought a ton of resources with her. I learned about two great playgroups from her etc. Anyway, this lady and her organization works with a ton of different children, autistic, handicapped etc. And because she came once a month she was also able to see the progress of things going on in my home. Now let me back up and say I don't get a lot of help other than Sam, let me rephrase that we don't get any help. He's a great father, absolutely no complaints there. But we're kind of on an island alone at times just me and him and at times that's really hard. I'm not in need of babysitters really (though a night out with the hubby every now and then would be nice) but I guess help and guidance from someone older would be nice at times. It's been hard for me to take unasked advice from well meaning people especially if they are never around my children and see them every once and awhile and have something to offer. And maybe I should clear that up because I can take advice maybe it just depends on how it's presented and where it's all coming from. And I said that all to say that this woman in her role has been a constant. For the past year she's come to my home and I began to really look forward to her visits. And I know it's just been a part of her job and in the beginning I didn't receive her well but through prayer I really began to see her value and she's gone through the toughest parenting decisions yet with Sam and I. Honestly now that I think about it she's been through just about everything...

Anyhow her name is Madeline and she's gone above and beyond her job in my opinion, and sadly since Nathan is turning 3 tomorrow would be her last day visiting though she said I could keep in touch. But the last time she was here she gave me the biggest help ever. I'd been down recently, as I said I don't have guidance and especially being home full time many people assume a lot of negative things. And the fact that my child developed late in certain areas and the fact that most people haven't dealt with that or just plain don't understand it can open the doors to a ton of criticism all coming from people who mean well. So before she left the house she told me that she's been to a lot of homes and she's worked with a lot of families and never has she seen two parents more involved and dedicated to their children's well being then us. She told me that she's blown away at the progress that has been made and really let me know that as one mom to another she can't think of thing I should do different except maybe slow down :-) and I took that as a huge compliment especially coming from her lol I'd much rather be told to slow down instead of get moving.

Through Madeline I've been introduced to several playgroups, two which I attend. They're extremely nice and I've met a ton of moms through it. But here's another thing sometimes when you ask God for help and stop seeking advice but only seek Him, He tends to bring people into your lives that you need. The head of the main playgroup we go too is a child Psychologist...imagine that. I didn't seek this it just happened that way. And along with the other mothers that are there there are also two grandmothers that have become very important to me. The playgroup is nice and is in a school building and the kids can play together from 9:30 - 12:00 and then we break and all eat lunch together and then we move to one of two rooms for gym until 1:30. It's usually about 15+ people there and it's nice because most of them are the same from week to week. But anyway I'd been going for two weeks or so and as I said I've kind of clammed up asking for advice and sharing too much about myself. I'm still really friendly but I don't volunteer any info or feel the need to share or explain anything to people. But as we're all heading to lunch one day, one of the grandmothers approached me and said "Does Nathan talk" and I answered "not much, he does but he's got a speech delay" and the grandmother said "I noticed that, see Lou (her grandson) he didn't start talking until he was almost 3 and a half." So from there a conversation started. The Debbie the facilitator came out and joined in offering a ton of helpful advice. Then Debbie stepped out for a moment and the grandmother said "FYI Debbie is a child psychologist." Then another lady chimed into the conversation and said that she'd been a nanny for over 20 years and she started offering advice. All helpful and all right on time. I could've seriously cause it's so hard to find people who understand and who can share with what you're going through.

So leaving to go to the gym I got into an even deeper conversation with the grandmother and found out she's a retired lactation consultant...this was helpful because my daughter can't drink milk!!!! The advice she gave was beyond what I needed. The I ran into the retired school teacher who told me about Orange schools.

I could go on and on about other ways God has been showing up in our lives but from all I wrote about, well you get the picture.